“Hello?” Rhapsody’s voice was groggy.
“Hey? Did I wake you?”
“Yeah but that’s ok. I need to be awake. What time is it?” She yawned into the phone.
“Damn! I closed my eyes for just a second after breakfast and now it’s time for lunch. This kid seriously draining my energy. Anyway, I’m sure you called for a reason and not to hear me being dramatic about a nap.”
“It’s ok. I enjoy talking to you no matter the subject.”
“Uh huh. You want something don’t you.”
I smiled. Damn if I didn’t love when she was sassy. It was such a turn on. My mind immediately took a turn down a very dirty path.
“Chord? You still there? Earth to Chord.”
Blinking away the dirty thoughts, I said, “Yeah, sorry. Uhm…I was wondering if you’d be willing to come to a family dinner with me.”
Silence. A very uncomfortable and long silence.
“Did you hear me?”
“Does that mean you’ll come?”
She sighed. “Is that a good idea?”
“Jimmy won’t be there. It will be my grandpa, sister and niece. That’s it. I promise.”
“Ok. I mean you were already put through the ringer with my family it’s probably fair I go through the same.”
I chuckled. “I think they will take it easy. They know you’re pregnant.”
“What?!” Rhapsody screeched.
“You told them already? What story did you come up with?”
“Yeah. What did you say about how this happened?”
“Rhapsody, they probably know how it happened.”
“Don’t be dense.”
“I really don’t know what your getting at.”
“Fine. Are we dating? Are you the sperm donor? Were we drugged and your sperm was implanted into me by some alien race? These are details I need to know.”
“Ugh! Come on Chord.”
“I didn’t tell them anything. They saw me with the ultrasound. They don’t even know it’s you. But, I’d like to say we are boyfriend and girlfriend.”
“And why haven’t they met me before now?”
“You’ve been busy at work?” I asked.
Rhapsody sighed again. “Fine. I guess that will work. We really need to work on your ability to come up with an interesting story on the fly. Standing there with your mouth hanging open doesn’t work.”
How the hell did she know I did that?
“You’re wondering how I know you did that aren’t you?”
I looked around my bedroom to see if there were some hidden cameras.
“I know you did that because I’ve seen when you are put on the spot. You stand there slack-jawed. It’s really quite telling. Anyway, what should I bring?”
“Nothing. I’m bringing drinks so, you don’t need to bring anything.”
“I’ll bring a dessert. I have the perfect recipe. What time are you picking me up?”
Rhapsody was a bulldozer sometimes. She’d probably answer her own questions if I let her. My cock was perking up at her being so bossy. Everything about this woman made me hard. What was wrong with me?
“I’ll pick you up at 3.”
“Sounds good. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.” I grimaced as I realized I’d just said that to an ended call.
With a shrug I plugged my phone in to charge then set about gathering my clothes to do laundry. A knock made me pause while picking up a pair of underwear.
Alec barged in. “Hey, fucker! What are you doing?”
As I looked at him while holding my dirty clothes, I waited a minute for him to notice. He didn’t. “I’m about to do laundry. What do you want?”
“Is that anyway for you to treat your cousin?” Alec laid on my bed scrolling through his phone.
“Oh I’m sorry. I meant to say, what do you want, fuckface?” I walked toward the door.
“Is that anyway to talk to your cousin who you need to borrow a car from?”
I froze. I forgot I didn’t have a car to pick up Rhapsody. Son of a bitch. I looked over at him. He had a shit eating grin. Fucker.
“Ahhh….I’m guessing you forgot about that.” His grin grew. “You can borrow the car. However, I’m coming with you….and I’m driving.”
My dirty clothes hamper slammed on the floor. “What? Why? You never want to see Miranda and Grandpa Lew.”
“You are right about Miranda. She’s a shrew that only yells at me for my life choices. I don’t have anything against Grandpa Lew. I miss him.”
I squinted my eyes at him. Alec was up to something. “Did Jimmy put you up to this?”
“Nope.” He went back to scrolling.
“Fine. I didn’t want to drive anyway. We need to pick Rhapsody up by three. I’m warning you now, if you fuck with her, I’m going to castrate you with a spoon while you sleep.”
“You’re threats don’t worry me, Chord. I’ll be ready by 2:30 tomorrow.” Alec sprung up from my bed then left.
“Stop listening at my door, Alec.” I yelled down the hall.
I was met with only laughter.
“Chord will you come play? Oscar is totally shit at Operation Death Stomp.” Benny called from the living room.
“I am not.” Oscar’s voice came out as if he was in a fog.
“You’re fucking high right now. Unhand the controller before you mess up my high score.”
I heard a controller dropping.
“I’ll play as soon as I start my laundry.”
“Good. Hurry up though. My life depends on it.”
I shut my eyes and shook my head. Then a thought crashed into my mind. How the hell could I bring my little pumpkin around these people. They would be horrible role models. Mentally, I’d started a list of things I needed to do before my little bean was born. Well, the list only had two things so far but they were huge.
Number one: Get car
Number two: Find new place
“Hurry up, Chord!” Benny shouted making me jump.
“I’m coming. I’m coming.”
“That’s what last night’s bar bunny said.” He laughed at his own joke.
I took a deep breath then mentally moved find a new place to the number one spot.